Put Your Phone in a Drawer

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As I’m one of the self-appointed parenting experts on Klout, I’ve been privy to the broad, “what is the meaning of life?”-type questions the site has been serving up lately to get us experts thinking. The other day, in response to “What is the best advice that you have for first time parents?” I gave the same (usually unsolicited) advice I always give to parents-to-be who will listen to me:

Both of you take the longest, hottest shower of your lives {separately is what I'm suggesting, but whatever suits you} right before the baby is born. During the first few months of your baby's life you will think back fondly on being that clean and undisturbed...

As my wife and I have been through this three times now, I know that that bit of wisdom is still true. But the question got me thinking that there's an answer that's deeper-reaching. So my second take on “What the best advice that you have for first-time parents" is this:

Put your phone in a drawer when you get home to your family.

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Survey Says: Dads Do Bulk of Vacation Planning. We Say: So What?

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great-wolf-lodge-survey-dadGreat Wolf Lodge recently commissioned a survey of a thousand working dads, 61 percent of whom said they “handle all or most of the family vacation planning.”

The freakishly-long infographic at right highlights the survey findings and ends by asking “Is Dad in charge of planning YOUR family vacation? Or does he just think he is?” This impish question is no doubt meant to provoke good-natured debate between the sexes about who REALLY plans the trip, but I already think I have the answer:

So what?

See, I equate trip planning with making a Thanksgiving turkey: Seems hard, isn’t. But once you make your first turkey, you do nothing to dispel the myth that it’s hard, spending the rest of your Thanksgivings hiding in the kitchen with a turkey baster in one hand and a beer in the other, making the rest of the family sweat the details of doing…well, everything else.

Planning a trip does take research, creativity, and a little time. But it’s not nearly as time-consuming or challenging as it used to be. And let’s face it, any mouth breather with an Internet connection and a budget-tracking app can book air tickets and cap spending.

The question we should be asking is not who does the vacation planning, but who does everything else? Who packs and repacks? Who keeps the kids organized in the car, at the airport, on the plane? Who’s the field marshal in the destination sweating all the details, showering the sand off the kids and reapplying their suntan lotion, grilling the waiters about food allergies, serving as chief morale officer to ensure everyone else is okay?

Is that you, working dad, even part of the time?

If it is, that’s good, because that means you're doing some of the real work involved in making your family’s vacation successful.

Do you agree that vacation planning is just one piece of the puzzle? How do you and your significant other split responsibilities on a family vacation? Do you two argue about whether you're pulling your weight on vacation? Vice versa? Leave a comment below and then join a gathering of Traveling Moms and Dads for a robust #TMOM Twitter party from 9-10pm on June 10 when we launch a battle of the sexes: Moms vs. Dads on Family Vacation. RSVP for the #TMOM Twitter Party to be eligible to win a Home Depot gift card.

Not incidentally, my colleague Ciindy Richards over at Traveling Mom also questions the Great Wolf Lodge survey in her post Who Plans Your Family Vacation?

P.S. If you've never attended a Twitter party, it's pretty fast and furious. A program like HootSuite will permit you to easily monitor the Tweets, which in this case, will all have the hashtag #TMOM. Should you miss the party, you can always search the #TMOM tag afterwards. But you know what? Don't miss it. Tune in at 9pm Monday and buckle up...

 

Road Trips Before the Pink Strip

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Road trips are much easier before you have kids.

When it was just you, your wife, and the open road, you just worried about packing a few essentials. You could drive for hours without stopping, making record time to your destination.

That changes, though, the moment you see that little strip turn pink.

I'm the type that just wants to make it to my destination, no side trips, few-as-possible bathroom breaks. Let's. Just. Get. There. Once my wife got pregnant, however, what was normally a 4-hour car ride turned into 5. It was no fault of her own, of course, but it was a true test of my patience.

Patience, by the way, is something I am still working on.

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Getting Kicked by Route 66

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Marilyn bathroom Polka Dot Drive In
In an age of interstate superhighways, it’s hard to believe that Route 66 used to be such a major thoroughfare. The two-lane roadway seems impossibly narrow. Fortunately, we passed few other cars as we rolled along in our wide SUV.

It was my wife’s idea to drive from Chicago to central Illinois via the Mother Road. I had just finished rebuilding a 1967 Cobra Jet Mustang and it seemed somehow fitting that we should take the low road in honor of the heyday of American road trips. (We didn’t drive the Mustang--it’s not quite ready for a road trip. Next time.)

Route 66 signWe chose to skip the portion of Route 66 that runs through Chicago. We’ve driven it many times and we were anxious to get started on our trip. Turns out we shouldn’t have been in such a rush.

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How to Pass Down a Love of Baseball

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I have always been a big baseball fan. I played it in high school, and while I might not have been the best player, it didn’t keep me from loving the game.

My dad was also a baseball fan. His love of the game was what he passed down to me. I always enjoyed going to the ball park with him while he taught me the different idiosyncrasies of the game.

When I learned that I was having a son, I knew that I wanted to pass down to him the love of baseball that my dad passed on to me. We took him to his first game when he was six months old, and he loved it. He was not speaking then, but you could tell he was intrigued. He had seen me watch baseball on TV, but seeing it in person? Completely different.

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